I had all these plans to write to you from the day you were born to tell you just exactly how I felt during every experience with you. The truth is, you kept me busy from day one, and even when I had a moment to myself in which I could have sat down to write, I was too busy cherishing your sweet baby cheeks, your beautiful brown eyes, your sleepy little yawn, your goofy gummy grin and your peaceful dreamy face. I didn't want to waste the time away from watching you grow and learn and discover the world around you.
As I sit here with you peacefully asleep on my lap, I can't help but think about all the memories I have experienced in just these three short months. And as I slowly get ready to go back to work part-time, I can't help but think about the little things I have learned about you that I am sad I will miss during my time away.
Before I had you, I had no idea how my life was going to change. I have already experienced so much, and have already had some pretty big adventures.
Before I had you, I wanted to see the world.
I spent time traveling to places that some can only dream, which made me feel alive. I've been to the Big Apple, to the top of the Empire State Building, and even Lady Liberty's island, and I even stood at Ground Zero.
I've seen the Eiffel Tower light up at night and even stood on the top. I've been to the highest point in Paris, Montmarte, and even ate escargot. I've marveled at Notre Dame, discovered The Louvre and walked under the Arc de Triomphe.
I've seen Big Ben and Parliament from the London Eye, walked across the London bridges, checked out Shakespeare's Globe theater, and even hung out where the Queen lives. In fact, I even watched as the president of the United States rolled in to visit her.
I've dipped my toes in the Mediterranean Sea from Barcelona, celebrated the UEFA Champions League champions as we welcomed them back in their homecoming parade.
I've witnessed history attending the 2009 Presidential Inauguration in Washington D.C. and as a matter of fact, I was completely alone in a sea of millions of people.
I've experienced altitude sickness from the Rocky Mountains of Colorado, swam in the warm Hawaiian ocean in the middle of a rainstorm, chased ghost crabs at night on the outer banks, done cartwheels on the beach of the Gulf of Mexico, and made a difference in children's lives down south in Memphis.
I've gambled away my money in Vegas, experienced a true 21-run, lived and learned by becoming both a Coug AND a Husky, and thought my Summa Cum Laude accomplishment was actually something to be proud of.
But nothing beats the adventures I will share with you, and nothing will teach me more than you.
Before I had you, I didn't know what it was like to pull over on the side of the road multiple times before reaching my destination, just to find a binky. I didn't know what it was like to get the bath water ready at 3:30am or dance in the shower just to soothe the tears. I never before searched everywhere in a store trying to find your lion lovey, and I never knew how sick I would feel when you cried in your carseat and I couldn't stop to comfort you. I didn't realize how much I would cheer for every new milestone you would make, even if it was just the moment you finally realized how to grab things with both hands or just discovering your toes.
Every pediatrician appointment I am still amazed and grateful for that scale which indicates how big and strong you are growing... and it is all because of me.
I did not know that your first cold would break my heart, or that I would stay up all night just to watch you struggle to breathe.
There are so many things I have experienced with you that all my adventures will never replace. I didn't know that blowing air on your feet would make you laugh, and I didn't know you would be so ticklish on your feet. I didn't know that your Lion King Simba would make you smile, and I didn't know that all I would ever want in this world is to be the perfect mom for you.
Of all the adventures I have ever experienced, being able to raise you has already completely changed my life, and I am so blessed to have you. I can't explain how much you melt my heart, but I hope one day you will know that before I had you, I never knew how to love until I met you.